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Top 10 Valentines Day-dreams of mine

9 Feb

"Pops in doors" would think this was romantic

Like a lot of blokes “Pops in doors” has never been the most romantic of men, bless him, so I suppose this Valentines Day will be the same as the last 30 odd and I don’t mind really, *she say’s tongue in cheek* a woman can dream, can’t she? Now don’t get me wrong “Pops in doors” is the best husband in the world and the greatest dad, but he is somewhat romantically challenged, I mean it wouldn’t kill him would it, NOT to think on a practical level for once, which doesn’t mean a bunch of Tesco flowers and a box of choc’s will suffice either.
“Oh no, not this year matey.”

Below I have listed 10 of my Valentines Day-dreams for him to read and ponder over,

Top 5 Valentines Day-dreams of mine.

  1. Being whisked off for a romantic weekend, Paris maybe?
  2. Breakfast in bed and waited on hand and foot all day. *Bliss*
  3. A romantic dinner with dancing.
  4. A nice walk in the park and a pub lunch.
  5. Having the remote and the sofa all day, without any moans.

Any of the above I would love, nearly as much as I love him.

The next 5 are in case I don’t get one of the above.

  1. He has to fix the kitchen tap.
  2. He has to fix the front gate.
  3. He’ll re-locate all his clutter to the loft.
  4. His golf clubs will go on Ebay
  5. No nookie for a month.

I think that’s only fair don’t you ladies?

Forget all the above I just want Chocolate Chocolate Cake now…………

This has to stop… PERIOD!

12 Nov

The hysterical phone call I got this morning went like this…..

I’m in so much pain, I want a hysterectomy, I can’t cope….……

Will you come round please mum….. I need you……

The screaming voice at the other end was the baby crying her eyes out, poor love,

On my way sweetheart…….. said I with a sigh…..

Still in my PJs and 5 minutes later, *it took me 5* to find my keys, off I go, only to find her curled up in a ball on settee, gripping a box of Feminax and a glass of water, she’s not called the baby for nothing, she does suffer badly with her periods though, bless, but will she go to the doctors NO!…. which makes me angry especially at 6 in the morning…..

I do know what it’s like I, but in my day we had to get on with it, didn’t we, so the biggest plus of entering my golden years for me was I got to say, “get your fat bum on your menstrual cycle and get the hell out of here mother nature,” I no longer want your gifts”……..

Growing older shouldn’t be a chore should it?

11 Nov

In terms of the universe “growing” older is just the way of all things and shouldn’t be seen as something to be scared of, notice my use of the word growing there, rather than getting.

For those of us lucky enough to reach our golden years, well, we should as Frankie says, RELAX, that doesn’t mean sit on your bum all day and reek of old age, oh no. it means STOP worrying about all the things you thought important when you were 16, 20, 30, 40, and concentrate on what is important to you now.

As a woman growing my main concerns were my children obviously but I had silly worries like “what will people think” I would never be seen dead outside without my slap on, do I give a hoot now NO! I happen to think I am beautiful and I’m afraid the cosmetic counter no longer gets my hard-earned money “except for the odd lippy now and again” well you’ve got to, and whats a lippy between friends. Just because I’m grey with laughter lines, should I not feel sexy!

Housework was another worry of mine, I never felt there were enough hours in the day to get it all done when the children were small, I would run myself ragged tidying up all the time, the house had to be spotless for when any-one called, then my mum asked me one day, “what is more important, a tidy house or happy children?” well there was no contest the children came first and the housework was done twice a week and guess what “Pops in doors” does it now and I must say he does it well and enjoys it too.